Friday, August 13, 2010

Mitzvah Friday

Does it count as a good deed if you give up something that you wanted to do in order to do something else?

My MIL is sick again, back in the hospital only this time she's been diagnosed with a possible stomach cancer. Poor thing is not very happy about this; neither are we. So we are giving up the 100th birthday party in Atlanta, and going down to be with her and to see what has to happen next. If chemo - how? How do we support her and be there for her when we live 1500 miles away? We have discussed DH staying there for a few weeks, or even a few months. We've discussed having her come up here for a few months.

I guess we'll figure it all out.

I just hope that she can be comfortable thruout this whole ordeal.

Shades of Sheldon is (are?) worrying me. good deeds for the forseeable future is being with my MIL - supporting her and DH and myself. And maybe looking for a job.



sukipoet said...

Im so sorry to hear this Mim. The blessing is that your MIL has two wonderful, caring people to support her through all the decisions and possible procedures she must go through. I will say this, if your DH can possibly be there with her for this time, I would say any sacrifice is worth it. He just has one mom and she is going through a scary time. I know in this life of today few people can leave their regular lives and go to their parents at such a time. so of course it might not be realistic. But sometimes we have to be "crazy." Sending prayers and light and love. Suki

Jos said...

Oh Mim

I'm sorry the news isn't better. I'm sure that Sheldon does spring to mind but there are so many paths between diagnosis and what's to come. I will pray for you and your MIL if you don't mind ... hoping that things are not as dire as you fear. I guess it seems strange that people you hardly even know should offer prayers, but from such a distance there's nothing else I can offer.

In answer to the question at the beginning of your post. Yes it counts.

Warmest hugs to you. xx Jos

Lisa at Greenbow said...

Maybe you possibly not having a job right now is the universes way of taking care of you MIL?? I am sorry that you will have to miss the birthday party. It is so rough getting old. Well wishes to all.

Mim said...

Prayers always welcome, and Suki and Lisa - you are right. I have thought about how the universe turns and how things happen - sometimes for the best. In a funny way, it was good to have her ill last year and in a way to get us prepared for a more dire illness.

studio lolo said...

Damn. I was hoping that wasn't the case. She must be terrified.

I know you and DH will do what you feel in your hearts. I agree with Suki. If DH can be there by her side through this, then I say he'll look back on this as something huge in his life that he was glad he did.
Have the doctors said if she's a good candidate for chemo? Thank goodness you have your brother to help you through this from his experience.

I'm sorry Mim. I'm at a loss for words other than to say I'll be virtually holding your hand through all of it.

Please keep us all posted.


Cris, Artist in Oregon said...

Oh Mim, I am so sorry to hear this. How scary for your Mother in Law and you both. Its hard taking care of an elderly parent when you are there but to be so far away makes it even worse. I hope it all works out for everyone. My thoughts are with you.

Lynn said...

How sad. Your poor MIL has been through so much. I don't even know what to think or say about this one. Do they think it is curable?
Oh I hope so. You will be so busy and yes it's a mitzvah you'll be doing. Just so so sorry.
Hugs from me for you and all the family.

Robin said...

Oh Mim, I am so sorry for you all.
Just what you DID NOT need to hear.
It is easier sid than done, but please try to remember that what happened to Sheldon may not happen to your MIL. There are many other diagnosis and end result... and, it may not even be cancer. Time to think positive thoughts - really.

I am sending you, DH and your MIL all my strength and love - and prayers. This is not an easy thing to understand and accept...but I know you and your family will pull together and make all of the right decision.

Your Blogging Family IS HERE for you....and we will all give you as much support from afar as we can.

Saying prayers, sending love and strength to you...

♥ Robin ♥

ArtistUnplugged said...

Saddened to hear of your MIL's illness. I do not envy the decisions and logistics you have to work out. My thoughts and prayers are with you, wishing you answers for your situation. Please take care.

soulbrush said...

what a great mitvah you are doing, being there with her. it is so hard to get old and ill and rely on everyone to look after you. poor mil.

Michele said...

Mim, anytime you support your family, it counts as a Mitzvah. Your MIL is luck to have you and a son who care so much about her. I wish her well.

kj said...

one step at a time, mim.

the very information you need to make a decision will not be there until the time the decision is to be made. i figured out a while back that the universe works that way.

you are the most loving and loyal woman; anyone would be so blessed to have you for a wife and daughter-in-law.

and friend....

Lori ann said...

I'm so sorry Mim, and to answer your question, it does indeed count.


Debra Kay said...

Uh-I think my comment was lost...((((hugs))))

Baino said...

Mim this is horrible news and that one goo deed alone will make up for many Mitzvahs. Im crossing my fingers for you and hoping that it's not cancer. So hard to tend to those you love from such a long distance. I really don't know what else to say other than caring for someone else, certainly is a good dead and a labour of love in this case.