Friday, November 14, 2008

Friday AM

Even tho' I am home, I am not going into work today - am still too traumatized and need a real day off. Plus my lip would scare everyone - the medically inclined included. I am going to go to the local spa and get a massage, and a haircut. And put my feet up.

The worse part about the last few days was the waiting. Waiting for heart test results - echo cardiogram...stress tests...radioactive injections...pictures in strange cameras. I kept thinking - what is something is really wrong? What if I need a "procedure"? What if..what if...

I am hoping that this is a true wake up call for me - and that I can truly join Lynn's advice about living healthier and taking time for myself that will do me good physically. Why do I neglect my physical well being? Why do I take care of the outside but don't take good care of the inside? I'm trying to figure out why this is? Am I just lazy? Do I think I'm immortal? Do I hate gym exercise so much? (I do love outdoor bike riding but it's getting cold here and that makes it tough).

I used to do indoor spinning class and am going to try that again. It's good for you and makes you a better bike rider when the weather allows it. I HAVE to make myself get up and go to that. I HAVE to take my sneakers with me on a business trip and USE them for walks and/or at the gym. I have to learn to indulge myself with good health and not just with a good book and a cup of coffee in bed.

I know we've all gone thru these questions and that there are no easy answers. I'm hoping that this latest escapade will allow me to have that 'wake up call" that people talk about.

But right now..I'm heading back to bed with a good book and some coffee - there is a time and a place for each one of these indulgent actions and after the past few days - I don't trust myself with exercise alone. DH and I are going for a short hike later - just to get out and about. Its a start....and one has to start somewhere.

14 comments:

soulbrush said...

omg mim i got such a fright when i saw this, and the last post...are you sure it wasn't an after effect from the flu jab?(says she doctoring from afar). i think it is your body saying (yet again) you have to ease up and slow down and do less....hard to tell an a type personality to do less, but this is possibly the answer.i will check up on you later to see how you feel. REST!

word verification: messi

MuseSwings said...

Mim! I read your last post and this one and see what a traumatizing time you are having! You sound just like me talking about excersize which I do NONE of myself. Maybe we should start a support group between the two of ourselves and start doing a few toe touches or something. (would probably cause myself major injury) Anyway what a fabulous way to mend - at the spa!!! Enjoy and relax and don't worry in advance of knowing what's going on with you right now!

Debra Kay said...

Oh my darling-you are scared and I hate that. But going to the spa is the most sensible thing you could do.

I'm facing the same infernal, eternal questions-and the answer seems to be that I (we) don't value ourselves as much as we value others. What to do with that answer, I haven't a clue.

Mim said...

I always think of others first - always! Habit from childhood with rather dysfunctional 'rents and 5 younger boy cousins and brothers who I watched after. Today I am off to have a massage, haircut and etc (whatever I can scrounge up) followed by the light hike. Day by day - my new motto.

Teri C said...

Perhaps you needed this wake-up call. I sometimes wonder if that's why these things happen. So glad you are taking the day off and regrouping.

Hugs

ElizT said...

Thinking of you.

sukipoet said...

Your plans for the day sound very good. Yes, your body is telling you something. Wow, it sure is scary waiting for test results. The imagination just flies in such circumstances. Be well, Suki

studio lolo said...

When I had cancer in 1991 I looked at every blade of grass as a miracle of nature. I promised I'd do all I had to do to become healthy. I'd give up all of my bad habits and over-indulgences. I'd become a new woman. That was then.
Today I'm overweight, under-exercised and probably drink a bit too much wine. I'm a caregiver extraordinaire but not to myself, ever. I cry on my pillow sometimes because I let myself down time after time.
I've had one more BIG wake-up call after cancer and again I vowed to be better. Oy. I'm trying, but mostly failing.

Here's to all of us who need to learn that self-care is a good and necessary thing! Sure is hard though.

Big hugs and healing thoughts Mim :)

Fern said...

thinking of you too...

massage...YES!!

Lynn said...

Well this is great news that all those tests were okay Mim. So no stroke, no heart issue at all. Clean bill of health. That is a relief.

Yes, I've done that 'what if' and did stress test/echo/ekg/etc before and was so relieved I was okay too...but the fear led me to do my clean up act as well.

Thus as this year comes to an end I am within a 2lb range of my goal for this year weight loss, have kept up the healthy eating and exercising and look so much different/better/and have tons of energy. It is WORTH IT.
If nothing else I'll be a better looking corpse when the time comes! LOL

So I invite you to join us, as you mentioned you might, and be a part of our support teamn=, Cris in Oregon and myself and anyone else who wants to join in...just start where you are and recognize it as a life long path, not a silly diet plan, or something to do and stop doing, but keeping on as it feels so good to do and be!

I am always impressed by your biking and hiking and canoeing or kyaking...you seem way more athletic than I've ever been.

And now enjoy your restful day and pamper the heck out of yourself...
rest that lip...and enjoy life! I hope your DH has gotten over his fears too. Poor guy. ;-)

Mim said...

8 glasses of water today, chicken and butternut squash for dinner. Plus an excellent back and neck massage; a lovely highlighting and a haircut. Good way to start a new routine!!!! Thank you all for your caring concern. So funny that while in the hospital I asked DH to log on as and say "she'll be back soon!". ( he obviously didn't)

ElizT said...

But it is possible to have too much water.

Lisa at Greenbow said...

Good luck Mim. It is so difficult to change years of neglect. You can do it.!!

Mim said...

Eliz - I am definetly staying away from water intoxication - I know that can really upset the balance of electolytes in your system and make even more trouble. I am actually looking for a drink with some electrolytes (but not the huge calories from sports drinks) and will have that once a day. Also staying away from Diet coke - which I had about 2x week. Lisa - you're right...I CAN do it!